Women Drivers

Since I've become a mom, I have discovered I possess what I call "talents" while driving. I guess I could call them "tricks" too. Others might refer to them as "accident waiting to happen" or "crazy lady behind the wheel," but I see them as talents!

It all started when Brendan was barely a month old. I stayed too late at a summer festival and missed his bedtime. Needless to say, I had a screaming newborn in the back seat on the way home. Although the drive was only 15 minutes, it's pure god-awfulness when you're dealing with what seems like an eternity... I discovered that without taking my eyes off the road, I could reach back, find his mouth, pop in the pacifier (which never stayed in!) and hold it in Brendan's mouth while I proceeded to drive home. Now I did experience some neck strain, and a little cramping in the shoulder, but all was well when I had a sleeping baby by the time I arrived home :-)

My tricks have multiplied in the last year and a half. Rarely taking my eyes off the road, some of my new found tactics include:

rescuing pacifiers from the sides of the car seat and from the floor because there is NO WAY he is letting me have a remotely peaceful ride without one of those plugs in his mouth!

handing back snacks for the long rides (Yes, I know, according to the "books" kids aren't "supposed" to eat in their carseat! There are a lot of things kids aren't "supposed" to do!)

recovering "Buddy" (his beloved blanket) from the passenger side back seat -- he always happens to end up there... like every 5 minutes.

saving "accidentally dropped" sippy cups from the floor.

singing songs while performing "motions" to accompany these wonderful tunes...

passing back ANYTHING that will shut him up!! -- toys, sunglasses, water bottles, cell phones, you name it! *Speaking of cell phones, Brendan's sorry for the strange voicemails many of you sometimes get from my phone...

As I discover more talents, I'll update this blog.

And I'm embarassed to admit this, but I can do all of this while also on my cell phone... but I try not to.

I know, many of you are thinking, "how dangerous" and you are rolling your eyes, shaking your head at my stupidity. And then there are others -- probably moms -- who are shaking their heads in agreement, knowing exactly what I'm talking about! If you are a mom, and you have no idea what I'm talking about, then LUCKY YOU! You must have a "peaceful rider" -- I don't!!

Women are multi-taskers, whether we're driving or not. Just watch out for the crazy lady driver in the white Acura MDX , license plate EFX 8765!

p.s. that's not really my license plate, in case you're thinking of turning me in...